Bar Mitzva Resource page
Watch Proactive Chinuch presentation:
How to prepare your son for his Bar Mitzvah
By Rabbi Yehoshua Lustig Principal in Olei Torah Crown Highest
Bar Mitzva Boys Preperation
Preparation for the Bar Mitzva in order of priority:
1. Learn Hilchos Teffilin and other needed halachos
the most important thing for a Bar Mitzvah boy to prepare for his big day is to learn the Halachos of Tefillin before his Bar Mitzvah in order for him to fulfill this beautiful mitzvah properly and with the right kavanah.
In addition to that the bar mitvza boy will become obligated in all 613 mitzva so its important for him to learn the basic halachos for the moitzvos he will be doing like tzitzs, tefila etc.
2. Learning inside and by heart the Mammer - ΧΧΧͺΧ ΧΧΧΧ¨Χ© ΧͺΧΧΧΧΧ
it is the accepted Minhag that the bar Mitzva boy learns to say the Mammer of ΧΧΧΧ¨Χ© ΧͺΧΧΧΧΧ from the Rebbe Rashab.
3. Learn and prepare Pilpul to say.
It is very old custom for a Bar Mitzva boy to prepare an insight in nigla ie. on a concept in torah customarily on Gemara.
The Rebbe instructed Bar Mitzva boys to prepare this and would ask them about it in Yechidus.
In addition to the pilpul many like to have a speech to thank the guests ect. with a dvar torah prepared to say over. this should be in addition to the pilpul.
4. Learning how to read the Torah and the parsha of the Bar Mitzva
Some have the custom to lean to lein (βReadβ in Yiddish) Torah the week after the Bar Mitzva.
Its important to point out that it is not a priority at all and is not a Chabad custom. It is something important to learn but doesnβt have to be connected to the Bar Mitzva. there are boys who can accept the challenge to learn to lein please ask you Mashpia where you son is holding. Same applies to ΧΧ€ΧΧΧ¨Χ.
5. Learn how to read Haftora and the Haftora of the Bar Mitzva
6. Making A Siyum on Mishnayos
the Chabad Rabbeim would make a siyum on the whole Mishnayos before their Bar Mitvza and would require it from their children.
Its a big endeavor but those boys who can do it its a beautiful way to prepare for his Bar Mitzva (and for yeshiva in general).
in general one should learn mishnayos before gemara but unfortinatly most boys donβt finish mishnayos ever with saying that the Rebbe would encourage extra learning before the Bar Mitzva and if one has time and drive this is an important limmud.
7. Learning 12 Perakim Tanya By Heart
In general the Chabad Rebbeim would strongly encouraged boys to learn 12 Perakim Tanya By heart.ο»Ώο»Ώ
There is no source specifically to learn Tanya Baal Peh for the Bar Mitzva but it is a beautiful thing to do and some bays have accepted the challenge as a preparation for the Bar Mitzva.
The ο»Ώο»ΏRebbe would encouraged knowing the Beginning of Perek ΧΧ΄Χ of tanya by heart.
8. Learning the Nusach of Davening
Some boys want to know how to be Cazan for shabbos and yom tov which have a specific tune. Some would like to learn if they have time after all the other learning its a nice thing to know.
Parent Preperations
Preparation for the Bar Mitzva check list:
1. Order Teffilin
Teffilin can take time to make and the sofer might not always have in stock so make sure to order them in advance.
There are differnt types of teffilin:
Starps:
Our minhag is to buy Rashi and Rabenu Tam Teffilin.
Speak to your local rov for a List of places to buy.
2. Order Teffilin bag
Custom Teffilin bag can take time to make and the so order in advance. there are many types of styles and materials. standard is leather.
There is a trend by some to have very extravagant bags which is not needed at all and it can cause jealousy by those who cannot afford .
Remember to put contact information in on the bag.
list of place to buy coming soon.
3. Get Hat, Jacket and suit for celebration.
Best if you get two hats one on the nicer side for shabbos and yom tov and one on the cheaper side for weekday.
Borsalino, Belissimo or Primo hatters are two great stores in crown highs to shop to find a hat.
4. Pick a Date and plan the Bar Mitvza Celebration
Minhag Chabad is to do the day following the Bar Mitvza if its not possible one should try the night before.
In the circumstance that its not possible on the nights of the actual birthday one should make a small event the day of with at least 10 people to celebrate the speacil day and make the official celebration another night. Make sure its not before the birthday.
while planning the event have in mind this is a very big day spiritually for the bar mitvza boy and a good time to add it chassidishe values. Chassidim would always use the day of the Bar mitzva to learn and Make a Farbrengen for their sons.
the Rebbe also pointed out that one should not spend a lot of money of the Bar Mitzva celebration and a local Bar mitzva with friends is better the a destination trip.
Tips for birthdays on irregular day:
Sefiras Haomer:
because music can not be played some postpobe the celebration but make a small celebration on the day of the actual birthday.
Some hire a choir or make a farbrengen,
Summer:
If the bar mitzva boy is going to camp, most Chabad camps have an option of making the celebration in the summer speak to the camp befroe the summer to arrange.
Some want to do it after so more community people can come. Remember again to make something small the day of.
Shabbos or Yom Tov:
Many like to make a Shabbos day event in Shul - speak to the shul to arrange before hand.
Some prefer the weekday option and will do it Motzoie shabbos or Sunday.
5. Choose a Date for the Hanachos Teffilin
Its is Mihnag Chabad to calculate and put on tefillin without a Bracha Two months before the Bar Mitzva. there is nothing wrong with starting earlier to practice.
if there is a 7 day yom tov in the two months before the Bar mitvza one should add a week to the two month count.
A Bracha When ever you feel he is good at putting on Tefflin and knows how to put them on well alone.
Its best of the Father can Daven with the boys for the first week or two to help him with his Teffilin.
Its the custom for the Bar Mitzva boy to say the first ΧΧΧͺ of the ΧΧΧΧ¨ (see Bellow for help on that) by heart.
In Houston the custom is to say the mammer after davening and bring some cake and drinks to celebrate in the lunch room.
6. Find out which parsha the Bar Mitzva will be on and reserve aliya in Shul
its a Minhag to get an Aliya the first available time after the Bar Mitvza - Could be monday, Thursday, Rosh Chodesh etc. Some have the Minhag to get on the Shabbos after as well. Best is to tell the Rov or Gabi (in Houston - Rabbi Marinovski or Rabbi Zally Lazzors) prior to Shabbos.
Double check you know which Parsha you can use this tool to help as well.
Hilchos Tefillin & Minhagim for the Bar Mitzva
Learning the Halachos
the most important thing for a Bar Mitzvah boy to prepare for his big day is to learn the Halachos of Tefillin before his Bar Mitzvah in order for him to fulfill this beautiful mitzvah properly and with the right kavanah.
Here are some resources to help with the learning in order of level of learning:
Χ©ΧΧ ΧΧ§Χ¨
Shevach Yakar is a sefer that has all the halachos and Chabad Minhagim Written in a very clear way. an amazing resocer and a must fo every bar mitzva bachur go through. it also has the Bar Mitzva mammer printed.
One can buy it at any chabad judaca store like here
Χ§ΧΧ¦ΧΧ¨ Χ©ΧΧΧΧ Χ’Χ¨ΧΧ
Kiztur Shulcha Aruch written by Harav Sholomo Ganzfried is an abriviated version of the Shulchan Aruch. Accepted by Klal Yisroel as a must read for every Yid.
Hilchos tefflin is in Siman 10 - Translation from Chabad.org
It can be found at any judiaca store in any language. There is a copy printed with all the Minhagim of Chabad which can be founb at any Chabad Judaca store like here
Χ©ΧΧΧΧ Χ’Χ¨ΧΧ ΧΧΧΧ΄Χ
we are very privlaged to have all the hilchos of teffilin form the alter rebbe which has the sources of the halachos as weel. althogh its very lenthly its a great limmud for those who want more then the kitzur.
Hichos Tefflin is from Siman 25 - Translation from Chabad.org
Shlchan Aruch Harav was trasnlated to english which one can buy at any Chabad Judaca store like here
Additinal Laws/Hilachos Tefillin
Bar Mitzva Mammer - Issa BβMidrash Tehillim 5634 / ΧΧΧͺΧ ΧΧΧ¨Χ© ΧͺΧΧΧΧΧ ΧͺΧ¨ΧΧ΄Χ
it is the accepted Minhag that the bar Mitzva boy learns to say the Mammer of ΧΧΧΧ¨Χ© ΧͺΧΧΧΧΧ from the Rebbe Rashab.
Mammer Audio
Bar Mitzva Mammer Recording by Rabbi Eli Lipsker - Yiddish
Bar Mitzva Mammer - divided by ΧΧΧͺ - Yiddish
ΧΧΧͺ ΧΧ³ A1-A11
ΧΧΧͺ ΧΧ³ B1-B5
ΧΧΧͺ ΧΧ³ C1-C5
Leining/Krias Hatorah
Krias Hatorah Resources
Some have the custom to lean to lein (βReadβ in Yiddish) Torah the week after the Bar Mitzva.
Its important to point out that it is not a priority at all and is not a Chabad custom. It is something important to learn but doesnβt have to be connected to the Bar Mitzva. there are boys who can accept the challenge to learn to lein please ask you Mashpia where you son is holding. Same applies to ΧΧ€ΧΧΧ¨Χ.
Here are some resources:
ΧͺΧΧ§ΧΧ Χ§ΧΧ¨ΧΧΧ - The best one.
In order to practice to lein one needs a Tikkun Korim (βtikunβ in shot) which has the nekudos on one side and the Torah side with out any trop or nekodus. Althog hany tikun korim can do the job The best tikun is defiantly the ΧͺΧΧ§ΧΧ Χ§ΧΧ¨ΧΧΧ Χ‘ΧΧΧ ΧΧ which has a clear print and many good additions to help on the kriah. it can be found at any judaca store like here .
Torah Trainer - Chabad.org
Learn to Read Torah and Haftarah With Trop (Audio)
Use this interactive tool to learn to chant the Torah at synagogue. Select any Torah portion or Haftarah.
Krias Hatorah Help - The Mitzvah Club
The Bar Mitzvah Torah Trainer has been serving the community across the globe for the past five years. The curriculum helps students and educators alike to master Torah reading in general, and particularly their Bar Mitzvah Torah reading, using our innovative, patented βlayers system.β
In addition to our trademark layered book, the Bar Mitzvah Torah Trainer package includes:
π The complete Torah reading with the corresponding audio
π·οΈ The book is customized to each student with their name
π¬ Bar Mitzvah βSpeech Startersβ
π The Halacha and history behind what happens in Shul
ππ»A Torah Pointer
This curriculum currently is being used by students from a variety of backgrounds: Chabad, Modern Orthodox, as well as Hebrew School students are all using this curriculum with much success.
Sefardi reading can be added upon request.
Please reach out to Rabbi Levi Lipinski with any questions.
βοΈ Levi@TheMitzvahClub.com
π +1 (484) 416-2717
π₯οΈ www.TheMitzvahClub.com
